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Rambles, ponderings, rants, and nonsense...
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Thursday, March 04, 2004
I'm going to wrap myself and hide in a blanket now. I'm feeling kinda down lately. Past woes are frightening, and the strange monster of loneliness is even worst.
My golden retriever, Doggie, past away last night. I think she's been poisoned by a late night stranger who lightly rang our doorbell at 12:30 to 1am early Sunday morning... My brother didn't opened the door, and so he woke me up, cuz I was dozing off trying to catch up on my reading on Dante's Inferno... After waking up, the doorbell kept on ringing, but no one else woke up... Then a little after 1am, the stranger left, and my brother and I heard the car speeding off... A couple of days later, we noticed that Doggie wasn't barking to strangers like she normally would nor did she eat. She looked so worn out, shriveled, and small like a little puppy... And finally, yesterday, she's gone...
She's been with my family for some 10 or so years?---something like that. But anyway, she's the best and most loyal dog we've ever had. She's a bodyguard, who walks with you once you step out of the house all the way to your car. She even knows how to open the fence with her muzzle, until we got the sliding kind... She'll sit obediently while you fill her dog dish with food. Even if you give her food from your hand, she takes care not to bite you---so she nibbles slowly to get the food out of your hand. She chases every single stranger out of our house---literally... And we did get enough complaints from neighbors, but that doesn't mean that she's vicious. She's just doing her job, and she's really good at it too. When rearing her own children, she even teaches them to bark, look after the house, obey the master, and even try not to get under cars, because the tires will just crush the puppies... My gosh, it's so tragic that she's gone... It'll be a while---or maybe a long while before we find another dog like her. And also, she was so much a part of my childhood happiness too...
Anyway, I just went to Candy's site some hours ago to find that one of her blog friends committed suicide and is now gone. That made me cry. I'm pretty sure when I read this at the UST library, people were wondering why I was crying. Seriously, I have this mad attraction to people with tragic lives, because I can always relate to them. I just feel sorry that there weren't enough people who could help him prevent what he did. All I can do now is pray. And people commit suicide all the time. It's depressing, especially when the the BIGGEST reason is over love. It's all what we crave and need, like we need air, water, and food to live. He didn't deserve that, and he shouldn't have done that... One fragile soul like him is always a beautiful person---but now he's gone... May God bless him and give him much grace, peace, and love.
Continuing on the subject of love and friendship, I feel as if there's no one out there for me anymore. I feel as if I'm going further and further away from people... And that's adds more to my heartaches... I can't think now, and I haven't been in the greatest mood for weeks. Not to mention that I'm worried about my friend (who's like my little sister) who just had a nervous breakdown several days ago...
Anyway, sorry for a depressing post, everyone. I couldn't find the heart to post Part II of my Daily Laughs... I will later when I'm better in spirit.
Take care everyone, until the next post!! <3 <3 <3
// rambled by A~Lotus at 2:52:00 PM
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© Kathy Nguyen, 2000-present.All rights reserved, unless if noted otherwise.
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